Teri Holland (01:25.996)
If your life feels like.
Teri Holland (01:39.552)
If your life feels like you're in a constant loop of chaos, constant drama, burnout, or why does this keep happening to me moments, you're not cursed, you're conditioned. Your unconscious mind might actually believe that chaos equals safety. And in fact, in NLP, we call this a complex equivalence, but those two things are not equivalent.
So today on Success of Mind, I'm going to show you why your mind keeps recreating chaos, how to finally reprogram that pattern so that you can feel calm, safe, stability, and have the success that you want. And for those of you who are new, I'm Terri Holland, high-performance coach, hypnotherapist, and believer in your potential. So let's break that pattern today.
Teri Holland (02:33.506)
Have you ever noticed how some people just cannot catch a break? They finally get ahead and then something happens, a fight, a setback, an emergency. It's like life keeps pulling them back into the storm. And maybe this is even you who's experiencing this pattern right now. Your nervous system is not wired to care if something is good or bad. It only cares if it's
familiar. And if you grew up in an environment where chaos was the norm, where love, attention, or safety were unpredictable, your brain is wired to expect that chaos equals home. So when life gets too calm, too good, too quiet, that part of your mind starts to panic. It says, wait, wait, wait, wait, this is not normal.
We don't do peace here. And unconsciously, you will create a little chaos in order to feel safe again, because it's familiar. And that could be picking a fight with someone or procrastinating on something that matters so that you get that pressure at the last minute deadline to finally do it. Or maybe so that you get the consequences of not doing it, which then puts the pressure on to get it done.
Maybe it's blowing up your schedule so that you can feel busy. Because busy feels safe when calm feels dangerous. You're not addicted to chaos. Your nervous system is addicted to familiarity. Peace feels unsafe if you grew up with unpredictability. So let's break this down. In NLP terms, your unconscious mind's highest priority is to keep you alive.
not happy. And what's familiar equals survival. It's what's known. So even if that familiar pattern causes you pain, your mind keeps looping it, recreating it, because pain is predictable and it feels safer than peace, which might be uncertain. So that's why people recreate toxic jobs, money stress, relationship drama.
Teri Holland (05:00.104)
even when they know they don't want to anymore. Some might call it self-sabotage, but really it's self-protection. Your mind is just trying to protect you from the unknown. And that's why manifesting chaos isn't always about energy or the universe sending you tests. It's often your own unconscious matching. It's often your own unconscious mind
matching your external world to your internal wiring. The universe isn't testing you. Your nervous system is just trying to keep you safe. The chaos outside mirrors the confusion inside. So how do we break this pattern? How do we rewire this program?
So number one, you have to recognize the pattern. So notice where the chaos is showing up. Is it in your work? Is it your relationships? Is it in your finances? And then in your journal, I want you to write it down. I keep recreating chaos in blank. Awareness is the first step. Awareness begins to interrupt that automatic programming. The number two, you have to regulate before you redefine it.
You can't reprogram your mind while your nervous system is still in survival mode. So first, bring your body back to safety. You can do this by taking a slow, deep breath, drop your shoulders, release your jaw, feel your feet flat on the floor, and say to yourself, it's safe to be calm. Calm is safe.
this starts teaching your unconscious mind that calm doesn't equal danger. Calm equals safety.
Teri Holland (07:00.354)
And then step three, we're gonna rewire the meaning. So ask yourself, or you can even journal on this as a reflection. What did chaos give me? Maybe it gave you attention. Maybe it made you feel needed. Maybe it helped you to avoid stillness because in that stillness, you'd have to feel something that maybe you're avoiding feeling. And whatever the answer is that comes to you,
Just thank your unconscious mind for trying to protect you. Thank you unconscious mind for protecting me.
and then say, I can have connection, excitement, safety, attention, whatever the chaos was giving you, I can have that thing without chaos. That's the new instruction. That's the new program we want to install. And then step four, we're going to rehearse the new pattern. So I want you to do a visualization. You're gonna visualize.
this for your nervous system. You're going to practice. So what I want you to do and we can do this together right now if you're not driving or you're not doing anything which requires your conscious attention we can do this now and if you are driving or you're doing something that requires your conscious attention then come back to this part later or or you can listen but but don't do it until it's safe to do so.
Okay, so let's practice this new pattern. Again, only if it's safe to do so, close your eyes, take that deep breath in, hold it for a moment and exhale.
Teri Holland (08:51.79)
let your shoulders drop.
Release your jaw.
Teri Holland (08:59.842)
That's right. Feel your feet on the floor.
And I want you to imagine waking up in a calm morning. Your to-do list is clear. Your body feels light. Nothing is urgent. And you feel safe.
hold that image.
Teri Holland (09:31.462)
This is your new baseline. This is the frequency you begin to manifest from.
Teri Holland (09:42.178)
Now take another slow inhale through your nose.
and let it out slowly.
Teri Holland (09:52.534)
and repeat after me either silently to yourself or out loud. It is safe to be calm. It is safe to succeed. It is safe to let life be easy. Let those words sink in. Because the moment your nervous system learns that calm is safe, chaos is no longer home. So let's repeat those.
more times repeating after me silently or out loud. It's safe to be calm.
Teri Holland (10:32.297)
It's safe to succeed.
It's safe to let life be easy.
Really feel it in your body. Let those words sink in.
Teri Holland (10:48.344)
Good once more. It is safe to be calm.
It is safe to succeed.
It is safe to let life be easy.
Teri Holland (11:07.48)
Good, and now opening your eyes, coming back into the present. You see the moment that your body learns that calm is safe, chaos is no longer home.
Now if this episode hit home for you and if you realize that maybe you've been unconsciously manifesting chaos because I really want to drive this point home that you're not doing this consciously. Consciously you wouldn't choose it but unconsciously maybe you were choosing it. Take this as your sign to choose peace instead. You don't need to earn your calm. You just need to allow it.
And if you're ready to go deeper, if you're ready to really rewire these patterns that are keeping you stuck where you are, then book a session with me at terryholland.ca. Because success does not come from chaos. Success comes from alignment and alignment starts.
Teri Holland (12:15.968)
because success does not come from chaos. Success comes from alignment, and alignment starts in your mind. So thank you for joining me again this week, my friends. I will see you next week. And remember to share this episode with a friend who you think needs to listen to it too. All right, until next week, bye for now, friends.
